Yellow Journalism

"Is this interview on the record? Can I quote you on that, Bishop?"

Stress Eating

It turns out, Elder Toms and I have a lot in common. 

APB Missing Investigator

There were a couple of investigators on my mission on whom we would have liked to placed an all-points bulletin. In fact, it seemed like a sick running joke with my investigators that if they should any sign of progress, they would disappear into the ether. 

One investigator was hit by a car and spent a month in the hospital with no way to contact us. Another just vanished (we never met him at his home). And a third got summoned to the Vatican to meet with some Catholic bigwigs and was so spooked by the call that he never had anything to do with us again.

Unfortunate Greeting Card

Today's strip represents the extent of my rhyming abilities.

No Meetings in Paradise

The week between Christmas and New Year's is low-key on of the best weeks for week during the year. The office is empty, there are no calls or emergencies, and absolutely no meetings! My work calendar for the week is completely empty. I can't remember the last time that was the case. This must be what paradise is like.*

*Working retail, of course, is a completely different story. I feel for anyone dealing with customers looking to make returns or who are otherwise working with a short fuse.

The Cold Shoulder

I remember making a couple of snowmen missionaries in a field outside my apartment during my second Christmas in Slovenia. We even included a couple of old ties to complete the outfit (we stopped short of adding name tags). When we came home after a day of delivering treats and holiday wishes to members and investigators, we found our snowmen had been knocked over and kicked in. 

It seems some folks don't like missionaries in any form. 

Merry Christmas, everyone!

Angels' Other Gigs

Chutzpah is the Yiddish word that best describes what's going on here. 

Serious question from someone who has been told more than once that he lacks any kind of musical pitch, are there other jobs for the heavenly hosts other than singing hallelujah? I don't even play a horn or harp. I worry that cartooning is not a skill that is in high demand.