Word of Wisdom Problem

The Ultimate Door Approach

Earlier this week, I posted a less effective door approach. Today, I'm posting the ultimate door approach. It's just a shame that I didn't think of this 18 years ago--my mission could have gone a lot different.
If you haven't yet, check out the hour-long interview I participated in on the Mormon Channel.

Radio Interview

As many of you know, the Church runs a streaming radio station called the Mormon Channel. The station runs a number of programs including one called Everything Creative which interviews LDS artists of all varieties. Their latest program is on LDS cartoonists and they picked me along with Brian Crane (the award-winning creator of Pickles) and the prolific and talented Jon Clark to represent the Mormon cartoonist community.* I had a blast meeting and visiting with these two talents, although I'm afraid that I came off as a helpless fanboy a couple of times when talking to Crane in particular.

The interview was conducted by the talented singer/songwriter Nancy Hanson who, incidentally, happens to sing my favorite version of John Lennon's Grow Old with Me (with Peter Breinholt) and the classic Christmas carol Once in Royal David's City. Please check out her music, you won't be sorry.

If you have a spare hour, please listen. You can find a link here.

*I really shouldn't do this because inevitably I'll leave someone off, but here's an incomplete list of the extremely talented Mormon cartoonist community: Val Chadwick Bagley, Cal Grondahl, Pat Bagley, Adam Koford, Kevin Beckstrom, Rick and Ryan Goldsberry, Mike Allred, Ryan Stoker, Mark Harmon, Nick Perkins, Ty Harmon, William Fortune, and that kid that sits in the pew in front of you at church.

But Wait There's More...

Jared's Family Group Sheet

It has long amused me that of the two brothers, Jared got a people named after him while his brother--who didn't even warrant a proper name* in the record--did all the work. Of course, these things happen when it's a descendant of Jared making the record (it's a variation on the whole "history goes to the victors" thing).

Incidentally, it's very possible that Ether was not just a descendant of Jared but the rightful heir to the throne (his paternal grandfather was forcefully removed from office). If Jared's father, Coriantor, was his father's youngest son and if Ether was Coriantor's youngest son; then Ether was essentially the king in exile. This would add one more stumbling block to Coriantumr, the acting Jaradite king, accepting Ether's call to repentance. Making Coriantumr even more your prototypical Shakespearean flawed hero.

*The Brother of Jared's given name was Mahonri Moriancumr (which might further explain why Ether never bothered recording it). The story of how we came to know this goes as follows: In Kirtland, during the early days of the Church, a brother Cahoon asked the prophet Joseph Smith to please bless and name his newborn son. Joseph did so, giving the boy the distinct name Mahonri Moriancumr and then explained that it was revealed to him that this was the name of Brother of Jared. The moral of the story: don't let a prophet name your child (see also Isaiah and his son Maher-shalal-hash-baz).

Without Beginning or End

This week my little brother/President of the Mormon Cartoonist Facebook Fan Club graduates from medical school. To honor him, here is a strip that he came up with smack dab in the middle of his mission (back when the thought of reaching the end of his mission--let alone medical school--probably felt incomprehensible).

Gospel Extrinsics*

This is a Sunday School course I'd love to take. Although, I might need some help with the curriculum. Can you think of further topics this class can cover? Share your topics in the comments section.

*I realize that extrinsic is an adjective and not a noun, but for the purpose of this joke, let's all pretend, ok?**

**I've been kind of overusing these footnotes recently, haven't I?

This Never Happened in the Book of Mormon, Did It?

Thus ends the serialized story of Elder Van Dyke's investigator Janez. Missionaries move around so much that not every story wraps itself up in a nice, tidy little bow.

2011 Summer Movie Post

(Warning: the following post is going to be quite geeky.)

Tomorrow is the opening day of the movie Thor, the first of four* major superhero movies coming out this summer. And Saturday is Free Comic Book Day.

To celebrate these two things, I'm posting today's gag starring Elder Banner (otherwise known as the Incredible Hulk), everyone's second favorite superhero named Bruce.**

*Five, if you count The Help.

**It has always fascinated me that comicdom has two heroes named Bruce (the other being, of course, Bruce Wayne--aka, Batman).*** Especially, since Bruce is such an uncommon name otherwise. According to the Social Security Administration website, Bruce was only the 465th most popular boy's name in 2009 with only 579 boys given that name that year in the United States. That means--according to my calculations--if you want your son to grow up to be a superhero, your best bet is to name him Bruce. Odds are 289.5 to one that your Bruce will grow up into a hero. Naming your son Clark (Superman) is probably your next best bet at 332 to one. After that your odds go down considerably. Peter (Spider-Man) is at 1,981 to one; Logan (Wolverine) is at 14,331 to one; and Tony (Ironman) is at 16,139 to one.

Honesty, you'd be better off having a girl. Just don't name her Diana (Wonder Woman); the odds of that name producing a superhero are a pedestrian 1,934 to one. Instead, try Barbara (Batgirl) at 444 to one or Susan (Invisible Woman) at 368 to one. Your best bet might be to name your daughter Shayera (Hawkgirl)--her name didn't even chart! (Of course, you'll have to deal with the unfortunate possibility that she'll sprout wings at some point.)

***I warned you that this would be an especially nerdy post.

Excuse Me, I'm Trying to Mope

I certainly know how Elder Van Dyke feels in this strip, I can't think of a single transfer during my mission that I was excited for at the time.